The past two days we have been fasting. Let me tell you, it
has been quite the experience. Obviously as a diabetic I am not supposed to go
without food. But as I was expressing my longing to be able to join the rest of
the group to God He kept telling me… go as long as you can without food. If
you need to take care of your level then do it. But just see what happens, LET
ME TAKE CARE OF YOU!
So that is what I did. I reduced my insulin and ate as
little as possible… and I only had to eat twice in two days!!! I took my level
several times a day to make sure I was alright and the Lord provided the
nutrients I needed almost the whole time!
Yesterday morning Patrice felt like her, Rachel, and I were
supposed to go see this three week old baby named Angel. And so we went. It was
insane to me as we entered the house that the mom, Grace, was outside while
this tiny baby was in the house laying on the bed alone. The mom did not want
her.
This was the second day somebody had visited them and the
first day Grace told them… I have a baby I want to give you. What?! I can not
even comprehend not wanting my own child.
As we sat there I really did not know what to say. I mean
how do you react to a situation like that? The one thing I do know is that I
will be going back.
As I ended my second day of fasting, the thing the Lord has
made me confident of is that He’s my Provider. He can provide the nutrients I
need to keep my level up without eating. And if I long for that then He will.
With this reminder in the back of my head I have been thinking back to Angel.
As hard as it is to see that kind of situation, knowing my God provides for me
makes me CONFIDENT that my God will provide for her as well. He will use me to
provide her with love and comfort while I am here, and He will use somebody
else to provide that as I continue elsewhere. MY GOD IS MORE THAN ENOUGH…
“And the Lord will continually guide you, and satisfy your
desire in scorched places, and give strength to your bones…” Isaiah 58:11
This was the verse that was given to me at training camp. I
did not really understand it all that much at first, but I am starting to get
some of it. This is only the first half, and God is starting to show me what it
means. He will provide all these things for me if I just allow Him to!
